Let’s discuss the importance of preserving the autonomy of defining what spirituality means to us individually. How you define spirituality, how you protect your beliefs, and how you choose to set boundaries around it can provide peace of mind and foster self-determination, self-confidence, and self-love. This is by no means selfish: It’s our autonomy and self-efficacy.
Our spirituality is our own very personal, inner sanctuary. It’s our inner world and defines our inner voice, and the likelihood that someone else knows what goes on within us individually, is just, well, unlikely. Even those sitting immediately next to you with the same spiritual belief is not going to hear the same inner voice and therefore have the same inner knowing as you.
Let’s embark on a journey to understand the profound benefits of setting spiritual boundaries with others and explore practical ways to cultivate and maintain these sacred spaces.
What is a boundary:
A boundary is how we determine we are going to respond to a person or situation. It is identifying what is acceptable and tolerable to us, and when something happens that isn’t acceptable or tolerable, how we respond should protect our values and priorities. We may or may not choose to share our boundaries with others. Healthy communication is always our best choice, but when there’s a concern of someone goading or mocking us, or even arguing with us about our beliefs and boundaries, it is sometimes in our best interest to not communicate them to allow us flexibility. Our boundaries can be flexible since we cannot always predetermine how we will react in certain situations, and we want the autonomy to make changes with our choices. We teach people how to treat us and establishing boundaries will protect our moral compass and self-efficacy.
Opinionated or Judgmental:
Opinions are about personal tastes and preferences. You might have an opinion about shoe styles or personal preference about ice cream flavors. We’re entitled to our opinions! Judgments, however, are about what you believe others should be doing, saying, wearing, or believing. Judgments are fault-finding and an attack on the other person’s character. Judgments communicate that your superior knowledge is right about what is best for everyone else, and the person with the judgment typically wants to argue and justify the same. Judgments are intended to generate shame and guilt.
Most of the various religions and spiritual beliefs have been around for hundreds if not thousands of years, with a multitude of followers and believers. When one person or one group claims to have a true and total explanation of what is “right and wrong”, this does not honor all of creation in it’s entirety. Those trying to control other’s beliefs, those who believe they are somehow superior in their own knowledge and beliefs, and those who negate our subjective beliefs about something greater than ourselves, are in need of being presented firmly with our boundaries. A line in the sand, a barbed wire fence, or a nice white picket fence; like beliefs, your preference with how you set your boundaries are personal choices as well. “No” is a complete sentence.
Inner Sanctum Preservation:
Just as a garden needs tending to flourish, your spiritual self requires protection. Establishing spiritual boundaries safeguards your inner sanctum, ensuring that external influences do not infringe upon the sacredness of your soul. This preservation fosters a sense of inner peace and harmony as well as autonomy. You deserve the time and space and self-determination of what is best for you without other’s expectations, without other’s judgments, without feeling you need to please someone else, and without another’s interference. Your pursuit of peace is personal and sacred and should be treated just as that: personal and sacred.
Aligning with Your Beliefs:
Setting spiritual boundaries allows you to align your interactions with your core beliefs and values. By clearly defining what is sacred to you, you create a framework that ensures your engagements with others resonate with the authenticity of your own personal spiritual journey.
Most of us believe that others should be treated with compassion and empathy. That’s a belief – a belief of how we treat others, how we want to be treated, a belief that is greater than ourselves. Higher than ourselves. A higher power. Our words and actions being consistent with those beliefs is called “ego syntonic”, and our actions and words inconsistent with our beliefs, values, and priorities is called “ego dystonic”. This creates a dis-ease in us and a feeling of discomfort. Spirituality is not necessarily about religion or organizations – but it is about our respective values.
Embracing Emotional Well-Being:
Every interaction involves an exchange of energy. Spiritual boundaries act as filters, allowing you to discern and manage the energies that enter your spiritual space. This conscious filtering contributes to emotional well-being, preventing the infiltration of negative energies that may disrupt your inner equilibrium. It doesn’t feel good to be judged or insulted; to have others question the very essence of who you were created to be. There’s not one type of tree, one type of grain of sand, or one type of bee. It’s up to us to protect our spiritual energy and spiritual assignments while on this earth and depending on what you believe, maybe even beyond.
Empowering Emotional Resilience:
Boundaries provide a stable foundation for emotional resilience. They empower you to navigate challenging situations without compromising your spiritual serenity. The ability to protect your emotional and spiritual well-being fosters a sense of empowerment, allowing you to engage with the world from a place of strength. The more we practice something the better we get and practicing our own faith and our own belief is no different.
Strengthening Relationships:
Setting spiritual boundaries involves clear, healthy communication about what is sacred to you. This transparency enhances relationships by ensuring that others understand and respect your spiritual values and in turn you can let them know that you respect theirs as well. It lays the groundwork for deeper connections built on mutual compassion, understanding, and reverence. You might also learn from another when you approach their beliefs with curiosity and encouragement.
Mutual Growth:
Healthy boundaries contribute to the mutual growth of individuals within a relationship. As each person respects and supports the spiritual boundaries of the other, it creates an environment where both can evolve along their spiritual paths without hindrance.
Ways to Practice our Spirituality:
a. Rituals & Routines:
Incorporate rituals and routines that symbolize and foster your spiritual beliefs, such as meditation, prayer, or visualization.
b. Mindful Communication:
Convey your spiritual values with mindfulness and compassion. Clearly express what is sacred to you, allowing others to understand and honor your spiritual boundaries.
c. Selecting Environments:
Choose environments that align with your spiritual well-being. This may involve being discerning about the spaces you frequent, ensuring they contribute positively to your spiritual journey.
d. Prioritizing Self-Care:
Nurture your spiritual self through self-care practices. Self-love is not selfish. Set aside time for solitude, reflection, and activities that rejuvenate your spirit and strengthen your ability to maintain spiritual boundaries.
Conclusion:
As you navigate this life, you are allowed to honor and protect your inner sanctum. The benefits ripple across emotional well-being, relationship dynamics, and personal growth. By embracing your personal spiritual beliefs, and setting boundaries if need be, you embark on a transformative journey, fostering a deeper connection with your spiritual essence and those who respect the sanctity of your soul’s journey. We are entitled to our privacy which is not secrecy; we don’t owe everyone our spiritual truth. With mutual respect, curiosity, compassion, and a pinch of serenity, peace, and joy, there’s no reason we cannot all get along and live together harmoneously.
May your spiritual boundaries be a testament to the sacred spaces within, where your soul finds solace and flourishes in its unique dance with this world.